Naina had gas pains until she was two years old. It took us the best part of the first year of her life to realise why she was waking up screaming at midnight in uncontrollable pain. Doses and doses of infacol were consumed. Alternative medicine treatments were tried. Not feeding to sleep was tried. Formula was tried. No formula was tried. No medicine was tried. More medicine was tried. No luck. At completely unexpected times, like the middle of the day, Naina would develop screaming colic pains that made us fear she'd broken something. Confusingly, when she did break something (fell down the stairs and broke her clavicle), we did assume it to be gas.
When Deepti and Naina went to India in 2009, a single traumatic evening at a hotel was the worst of it. For the rest of that trip, the gas never re-occurred. Nothing. No medicines, no treatments, no rubs, no lotions, no potions. No no lotions, no no potions. I think you get my drift. The change was so dramatic, so reversed from the previous presentation one would think we were hypochondriacs who munchausenly made her develop gas to satisfy our desire to increase our affinity and spend at the local pharmacy.
Fastforward a few months to little Mr S. He too developed gas. He too would scream uncontrollably in the evenings and nights. Sometimes even with a dose or two of Infacol on board. I felt conned. Surely this never happens to little white babies. A keen eyed maternal health care nurse suggest something a little more rough and tough. Basically, baby mylanta. And cue trip to India.
Gas? What's gas is the basic refrain. Nothing. Nada. Zippo. Seriously conned. All good things must come to an end. They're coming back, sometime soon. I am already writing the next chapter (when little S returned from India...).
17 April 2011
05 March 2011
Relevance deprivation
100 days is a long time to be alone after the joy of children has entered one's life. I cannot explain some of my feelings but others are easier.
Initially, my anxieties were around male selfishiness - how will I feed myself, oh my god I have to iron my own shirts... After those initial feelings of uselessness passed, the over-riding feelings have been mainly on a sense of void.
I'm so used to coming home to life being turned upside down, without a moment to rest or relax, that this surplus, this excess, is proving dispiriting. Naina would throw her clothes out of her cupboard, find DVDs she wanted to watch, rummage through kitchen drawers, sprawl her toys everywhere in the lounge room. I couldn't leave anything of value anywhere. My keys would disappear if I left them on a too low bench. That sense of everything will be exactly where I dumped it/left it/ threw it is disconcerting now, where as a single man it used to feel refreshing. "Don't touch my stuff" has long since passed and he's not welcome in my life anymore.
The other feeling easily explained is purposelessness. Time is now available to sit in front of a TV. Problem is there's nothing worth watching except the intro to In the Night Garden (which brings a tear to the eye) and the Office (US). Work hours are extending cause there's nothing worth rushing home to. Shopping is a chore instead of a stress.
I'd argue that I'm technically in relevance deprivation syndrome. No one to read to, no one to take swimming and no one to chase up the stairs.
With the news that my mum's brothers two boys are both planning their marriages in the third week of May, I'll be deprived of relevance until that time.
Initially, my anxieties were around male selfishiness - how will I feed myself, oh my god I have to iron my own shirts... After those initial feelings of uselessness passed, the over-riding feelings have been mainly on a sense of void.
I'm so used to coming home to life being turned upside down, without a moment to rest or relax, that this surplus, this excess, is proving dispiriting. Naina would throw her clothes out of her cupboard, find DVDs she wanted to watch, rummage through kitchen drawers, sprawl her toys everywhere in the lounge room. I couldn't leave anything of value anywhere. My keys would disappear if I left them on a too low bench. That sense of everything will be exactly where I dumped it/left it/ threw it is disconcerting now, where as a single man it used to feel refreshing. "Don't touch my stuff" has long since passed and he's not welcome in my life anymore.
The other feeling easily explained is purposelessness. Time is now available to sit in front of a TV. Problem is there's nothing worth watching except the intro to In the Night Garden (which brings a tear to the eye) and the Office (US). Work hours are extending cause there's nothing worth rushing home to. Shopping is a chore instead of a stress.
I'd argue that I'm technically in relevance deprivation syndrome. No one to read to, no one to take swimming and no one to chase up the stairs.
With the news that my mum's brothers two boys are both planning their marriages in the third week of May, I'll be deprived of relevance until that time.
22 January 2011
Swimmingly well
Perth seems so long ago now, a month has flown past. For each visit, there's a tinge of nostalgia of 90's parties and crazy hair (man) and wistful wondering if we'll ever call it home. For now though, it's the week off work town.
We had gone to Perth to perform Sarva's sataysa pooja (naming ceremony) but for N, the highlight was the pool. And the iPad (sigh). Maybe the iPad first then swimming. Many nights passed with N's interest in all things Elmo and Night Garden and reading diminishing as the bright lights of touch screen iPad kept her awake. Sleep got delayed because of iPad games then even further delayed because of Deepti's phone, such was the hook of that evil iPad. We had even packed books for N to read. I suppose a book doesn't quite compare to a shiny lighty touchy thing.
The pool was the highlight for us, at least. N's more confident, Sarva as a first timer was comfortable after a couple of goes. N's jumping into the water, picking items off the bottom of the pool with her feet or hands and copying dada by swimming on her back and trying backstroke.
She tried getting back into the pool minus floaties once. A scientician that I am, I witnessed her go straight down, to her own surprise. I did catch her as soon as she went down. That'll teach her.
Naina really likes applying sunscreen (sum-scream?)
Deepti even managed a brief foray. Looking relaxed dear!
We had gone to Perth to perform Sarva's sataysa pooja (naming ceremony) but for N, the highlight was the pool. And the iPad (sigh). Maybe the iPad first then swimming. Many nights passed with N's interest in all things Elmo and Night Garden and reading diminishing as the bright lights of touch screen iPad kept her awake. Sleep got delayed because of iPad games then even further delayed because of Deepti's phone, such was the hook of that evil iPad. We had even packed books for N to read. I suppose a book doesn't quite compare to a shiny lighty touchy thing.
The pool was the highlight for us, at least. N's more confident, Sarva as a first timer was comfortable after a couple of goes. N's jumping into the water, picking items off the bottom of the pool with her feet or hands and copying dada by swimming on her back and trying backstroke.
She tried getting back into the pool minus floaties once. A scientician that I am, I witnessed her go straight down, to her own surprise. I did catch her as soon as she went down. That'll teach her.
Naina really likes applying sunscreen (sum-scream?)Deepti even managed a brief foray. Looking relaxed dear!
Sataysa
Sarva was born under Jyestha, a mool nakshatra, which is considered to be bad luck for the father's health. I found this rather dramatic explanation on the internet.
There are twenty-seven constellations (Nakshatras) in all some of which are considered inauspicious. A child born in the first stage of the 'Moola Nakshatra' brings destruction to his father, In the second stage- to his mother, In the third stage- to wealth and property. A child born in the fourth stage of the 'Moola-Nakshatra' though remains harmless but it is better if the rituals are performed for the pacification of this Nakshatra because it eliminates the fears and apprehensions that is generally associated with the name 'Mool-Nakshatra'. If a child is born in any of the following Mool Nakshatras, the pacification becomes mandatory to neutralize the ill effects.
As a consequence, we were advised a special prayer was required. A five hour prayer. With lots of accessories. I reckon like all good churches, the hindu church is a great untaxed industry, with patronage at the highest places.
Anyway, the ceremony proved to be far too arduous for us to organize in Melbourne on our own with two kids, as it had to be done on a set date, at a set time, with only certain North Indian type priests. So a trip was made to Perth at Xmas/New Year and Sarva's "sataysa" pooja was planned. My mum loves this stuff.
Deepti and I performed most of the rituals, but Sarva was required as a prop at some stages. He performed well. With the 40 degree heat, we lasted the five hours. And yes I am wearing a hankerchief on my head. Naina will never live this photo down.
As a pleasing break before the finale involving the "havan" we were doused in tap water. Refreshingly cold on a 40 degree day.
Sarva displaying his one pack
Mr Bean
Getting cool
Happy baby
Haavan ceremony (fire to left)
Taking advantage of the itinerary, we planned to have his first hair cut (mundan) in Perth. After last time, I had wanted to organize it in Perth at the Hare Krishna temple but was told they weren't very good at doing the whole head, so leave it until Sarva got to India. So this time, he also had a little bit cut off by his buas. The full shave was performed in early February in India and the hair taken to Devgarh near Patna, on the Ganges. Anyway, Sarva was more interested in bua's dupatta.
Sarva was five months old by this stage (yes the ceremony was that long), so we also did his first proper cooked food meal (Annaprashan) ceremony.
It was such a long hot day, but worth it anyway. Even just for the ripped abs. And the multiple outfits.
There are twenty-seven constellations (Nakshatras) in all some of which are considered inauspicious. A child born in the first stage of the 'Moola Nakshatra' brings destruction to his father, In the second stage- to his mother, In the third stage- to wealth and property. A child born in the fourth stage of the 'Moola-Nakshatra' though remains harmless but it is better if the rituals are performed for the pacification of this Nakshatra because it eliminates the fears and apprehensions that is generally associated with the name 'Mool-Nakshatra'. If a child is born in any of the following Mool Nakshatras, the pacification becomes mandatory to neutralize the ill effects.
As a consequence, we were advised a special prayer was required. A five hour prayer. With lots of accessories. I reckon like all good churches, the hindu church is a great untaxed industry, with patronage at the highest places.
Anyway, the ceremony proved to be far too arduous for us to organize in Melbourne on our own with two kids, as it had to be done on a set date, at a set time, with only certain North Indian type priests. So a trip was made to Perth at Xmas/New Year and Sarva's "sataysa" pooja was planned. My mum loves this stuff.
Deepti and I performed most of the rituals, but Sarva was required as a prop at some stages. He performed well. With the 40 degree heat, we lasted the five hours. And yes I am wearing a hankerchief on my head. Naina will never live this photo down.
As a pleasing break before the finale involving the "havan" we were doused in tap water. Refreshingly cold on a 40 degree day.
Sarva displaying his one pack
Mr Bean
Getting cool
Happy baby
Haavan ceremony (fire to left)
Taking advantage of the itinerary, we planned to have his first hair cut (mundan) in Perth. After last time, I had wanted to organize it in Perth at the Hare Krishna temple but was told they weren't very good at doing the whole head, so leave it until Sarva got to India. So this time, he also had a little bit cut off by his buas. The full shave was performed in early February in India and the hair taken to Devgarh near Patna, on the Ganges. Anyway, Sarva was more interested in bua's dupatta.
Sarva was five months old by this stage (yes the ceremony was that long), so we also did his first proper cooked food meal (Annaprashan) ceremony.
It was such a long hot day, but worth it anyway. Even just for the ripped abs. And the multiple outfits.
09 January 2011
Practice
So roll up Perth trip. Xmas day didn't feel any different to a normal workday. It's strange how quickly time flies in the rush to get to a flight that will probably be late anyway. The flight over went smoothly enough; Naina watched DVDs on her new player for an hour or so, stuffed herself on icecream and any food that walked past and Sarva slept fairly contentedly. Though Qantas gave seats without bassinets so Deepti had to hold Sarva for most of the flight.
I came home to an empty house and a vision of my life from Jan 21 onwards. Over the next six days I managed to:
Meanwhile, Naina was having a blast at the Perth Zoo. Her time with Pammie Bua (Prani) and Dada-zee (Dad) was the longest non-school related time Naina's been away from either one of us. Clearly she was missing us.
I came home to an empty house and a vision of my life from Jan 21 onwards. Over the next six days I managed to:
- Eat KFC, Subway, Oporto, Nandos, Crust Pizza and Fish and Chips at least once and possibly twice. Don't worry, the Fish and Chips were cooked at home.
- Watch approximately 12 hours of cricket
- Spend two hours at the boxing day sales going to Good Guys, JB HiFi, Dick Smith, back to Good Guys, looking for KFC (at 10 am), Office Works, Chemist Warehouse (Panamax for 69 cents!) by which time I found an open KFC. Must remember to actually buy some electronics next boxing day.
Meanwhile, Naina was having a blast at the Perth Zoo. Her time with Pammie Bua (Prani) and Dada-zee (Dad) was the longest non-school related time Naina's been away from either one of us. Clearly she was missing us.
Attempting to make Sarva laugh
Naina throws the blankets. Sarva did not even attempt a laugh after the head lock.
Xmas eve
With the trip to Perth booked for 25 December afternoon, there was only one thing to do. Open presents on the 24th. There were a few surprises in store.
Imagine Naina's surprise when she got a vidal sasssoon hair curler!
The gruffalo sound book wasn't a big hit that day, now N won't let me touch it (cries of leave it, leave it, assertively).
Imagine Naina's surprise when she got a vidal sasssoon hair curler!
The gruffalo sound book wasn't a big hit that day, now N won't let me touch it (cries of leave it, leave it, assertively).
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